Build Me

The mountains stretch upward
trapping the polution in the valley
did it hurt when you saw
that a man made solution
causes more problems for the future?
did it hurt?
when you realized you weren't invincible
as the mountain face swallowed you whole
back to the Earth with which God formed you
in the palm of his hand like a child
promised he would never fail you
then forgot.
Did it hurt?
when you realized every lesson preached to you
since the first grade was just a story
of how somebody came to understand everything
through a fictional novel
would it hurt?
if you realized that there is no validity
to the seeds they sew, so
it hurts.
to escape this
I've been shooting life
straight into my prominent veins
it bubles my blood
but doesn't kill me because
it loves me
but I wish it would just kill me
so that I could answer all of lifes questions
did it hurt?
when I started shooting life
into myself with a shotgun
so that it wouldn't sustain
but only touch me for a little while
did it hurt?
when the world turned to black
could you perceive it
did it hurt?
with ur jaw stretched upward to the heavens
did it hurt?
when you heard them cry
did it hurt?
when you couldn't answer
it hurt.
It all hurt.
as this twisted jaw
whispered to God
but only the bird's heard
it hurt.
i felt it
as it coursed through me
as it made its way
back out to the world
I felt it
Like the first touch of a young girl
I felt it
because nothing that's sacred
means anything anymore
I felt it
you knelt to the floor beside me
asked me why
and cried with me
it hurt.
knowing that mother
I failed you
and left life hanging from the ceiling
for the world to see
but I love you
father
you built me from
the wrickedy remains
of broken bones
and sand
I failed you
but failure is only measured
on report cards
in life,
I'll aid you
so that your memory won't leave you
so that you can tell me all about
what it was like to feel left out
because there are so many things
and it's so hard to feel anything
that I want to know
what it felt like
to be real
not imported by a lark
from china
made with shitty parts
lead pant
and child hands
they are too young
to feel the touch of a man
so you called your self.
did it hurt?
to know more in a short life
Than in one lived through to the end
it all hurts
but I can't cry
because I'm a real man
So it hurts
Because my tears have been building up
since I was old enough to act tough
I'll just release them,
relieve them
it hurt.